********** This week is week 36. But I did write this back then but had trouble with my WiFi and the PhotoShop wasn’t working… so I gave up. But here it is now. Better late than never!! **********
Well, things with DJDM are still awesome. The past week or so we have settled into a pattern of him basically living here with me. We have only really spent one night apart, Friday night. I did a bunch of fun art stuff and drank my wine. I did miss him, but it was also nice to chill on my own too. But sleeping without him? While in some ways more comfortable, (my bed here is THE WORST!) I did not like waking up without him to snuggle with before he headed off to work.
This weekend was fun. Of course, there was lots of totally amazing sex, but there was also some fun times with his friends. He came over Saturday evening and brought a friend. We all hung out and talked and listened to music, at snacks, and drank way too much. It was F U N! One of my favorite parts of the night was how he told his friend over and over, all the things he loves about me, all the reasons he loves me. It is so affirming to hear him say it, not only to me but to other people. We finally kicked his friend out, he did not have the social skills to just leave, and I suppose we were having a lot of fun.
But we were too drunk and too tired by then to have any sexy fun! LOL We ran off to the bedroom all excited and horny, but laid down in the bed naked and passed out! LOL
Sunday, as you could imagine was a very chill day. We didn’t sleep as late as we expected, but we did hang out in bed for most of the morning. It was the last day of the Feria and his best friend was in town, so eventually we headed out to one of the busier streets to spend the afternoon. We had an amazing Costeño lunch, followed by a few beers in a nice little corner place where we could do some people watching.
Later that evening his best friend and his wife came to meet us. They live in Bogota but they were visiting here for the weekend. We hung out at a disco and the fellas drank whiskey and his wife and I had a few sips and a lot of water. It’s a little difficult for me to join in the conversation in those circumstances because if there is a lot of noise and activity, it makes it hard for me to hear and understand the Spanish. But it was still a nice time. DJDM was very happy to hang out with his best friend and I was happy that he was happy.
We had a truly amazing open conversation the other day about our feelings right now about group sex. He is definitely a swinger. He enjoys seeing his partner, ME, enjoy myself sexually even with other people. I think that is super hot. I just don’t find myself that interested in it right now. I want to soak up all his love for myself right now. I don’t want to try to figure out how to be with him and enjoy touching and playing and pleasuring him AND someone else. I just want his energy.
He was going to go to a swinger event, and not invite me because he knew I felt like that. He ended up not going, but it prompted us to have an amazingly open conversation about expectations, honesty, and what things might look like in the future. I felt even closer to him after that. I really enjoy our way of being. He even brought it up again while we were waiting for his best friend. His friend didn’t want his wife to know he had hung out with DJDM two weeks before. We talked about how that would never happen with us, that we can and will tell each other things and trust each other to make smart decisions and be safe for ourselves and each other.
Benjamin and I have been like ships passing in the night. We haven’t really had an opportunity to catch up. I really want to talk to him about DJDM so he knows where I stand with him. But I don’t want to just send it in a random text. He knows I have been seeing someone, but he doesn’t know how far this has progressed as a real loving potentially long-term enmeshed relationship. I’d like to talk to him about that. He is away for work in Asia so it’s going to have to wait until he gets back, time zones and work obligations messing with us here.
I am not too worried about telling Stefan. I’ll fill him in when I see him. He said he has lots to tell me too, but his time is so wrapped up in being with his family, it’s hard for him to find a chance to chat either.
Time is counting down to my next trip. I leave here on August 30. Too soon! I am getting excited for new adventures while at the same time I am already sad that I will be leaving DJDM. These next two months will include at least one pretty awesome side trip. (Note to self: start doing some research to make that happen!)
I also made my next set of plane tickets for the trip after. In order to enter this next country, I have to have “proof of onward travel.” So I had to buy my tickets for the NEXT trip to prove to the authorities that I will indeed leave their country within my allotted time. These next tickets? OH, they will be bringing me to a VERY awesome place! (Don’t you love the cryptic words?! I like to keep my trips a bit secret until the time I go, makes it a little more “interesting” don’t you think?)
I think I have a pretty solid plan through the end of the year. But some info I got the other day (See Personal Info below) might make my finances a little easier to manage and I can go a bit different direction. We’ll see!
As always, we had most meals in the house. It is fun to cook with and for him. But this week more than before, we went out to eat a few times. We went to a great restaurant on Sunday afternoon. It is food from the region of Colombia where DJDM is from. When you walk in, the grandmother of the owner comes to the table and tells you what you can choose from. A soup, a main, and a juice. It was delicious!
We went to a small corner bar for some beers and people watching too. At these bars, they bring you snacks, and they refill the snacks the whole time. For free. No need for dinner! HA!
We went to the Feria one night and ended up eating from a grill place. Basically, it was a plate of meat! YAY MEAT! LOL
We also went out for pizza this week. It was only ok. I am kind of picky about my pizza and this place definitely did not make the cut.
Been enjoying learning how to be in a more enmeshed relationship while poly. This is the first time, and it’s been pretty great. I really enjoy having a companionate partner. Someone to do things with, chill with, spend more time with. That is something I don’t have really, with either of my partners in Berlin. Having DJDM around all the time and figuring out how to stay independent has been fun and easy actually. Which I think says a lot about our relationship.
We have started to plan long term. I decided to stay here in Colombia for my knee surgery instead of going to Costa Rica. The cost-benefit breakdown just doesn’t work for me to go there. Even though I have friends there who might be able to help me. I have DJDM here to help me though, so that made it a bit of a easier decision too! So right now, I plan to come back here in January for possible knee surgery. I will stay until mid-march when I head to Eroticon.
The plan is for us to live together during that time, kind of as a trial run. I’ll get an AirBnB like I have now, and he will live there too. We will have been apart for 4 months, so this will be a nice way to see if it still works for us, and also how living together goes. After that, we’ll evaluate what our next steps look like. I love this plan! I can’t wait to come back and be with him!
The Amazing Wonderful World of Sex Bloggers
Check out these other stories on my blog: