The fact that I was sexting on and off all day with “A” made Monday a lot more fun. I love texting with him. We have been sharing some very creative thoughts with each other. He is interested in exploring some new and kinky things for himself, and I am so excited that we already feel safe enough to have shared these ideas and hope that we can do it together.
I love the kind of energy that we share. It’s unique to meet a man, especially here, who is experienced enough to talk about these things, but also open enough to be looking, openly for more. It feels like there is something unique growing here. I know, I know, it’s so new I can’t be sure, but it was fun, and I am excited. Cautiously optimistic. The thing is that even when being exuberant and ready, I tend to hold some essential element back, to make sure I stay safe. And now, especially after that experience last week with Juan… I can’t really let myself go too far here.
I took myself out for a nice lunch today. I decided I need to be dating myself more again. I haven’t been doing that here and I do need to focus more on taking care of me.
Oy, today, I am feeling exhausted. I sat out on the porch and got my work done, still in my jammies. We have a housekeeper two days a week (she comes with the AirBnB), and when she left today, it was so random, she said, “Your room is all set, you should go lay down and sleep for a while.” HA! I guess I looked like crap eh? But I never have make-up on and always have pajamas when she is here, and I am working.
What I didn’t realize is that she is some kind of Voodoo goddess because, by the end of the day, I was feeling like I was getting sick. My throat was sore, and my ear was feeling pain. I sent a quick text to the doctor to see what she thought, she figured if it was better in a day or two, it is a virus, and I would be OK. Guess we’ll see.
More texting/sexting with “A.” I am still loving the energy and fun I have with him. He even makes me want to write the story of our first experience together! I got half-way into it and realized this is a two-parter. I sent him the link to this part, and he was as hot and bothered about it as I was!
Also- I was having trouble falling asleep and started texting with Benjamin as he was waking up in Germany. He kind of “dommed” me into finally putting down the phone and going to sleep. Really love this guy!
Another boring working day. But the exciting part of today is that my sore throat got so bad had to go to the ER! It just escalated hour by hour, and even though I had an appointment for the next day to see the doctor, I started texting her and telling her, after a long afternoon nap, that the pain was significant.
I woke up with a very swollen uvula, and it felt like there were six men with machetes slashing at my throat every time I swallowed. Also, because of all that pain and confusion, my ear ache was getting worse and worse. I have a very high tolerance for pain, but I could tell this was not something to be messed with.
The doctor was concerned that I might have an abscess in my tonsils, and it could be surgical. She asked me to have my flatmate look at my throat, and when we reported back, she strongly urged me to go to the ER. GEESH!
My flatmate offered to go with me, and we hopped in an Uber and headed out. It was a normal ER situation. Pretty efficient flow. I had to do everything in Spanish, which was fine, but also a bit nerve-wracking when you are in so much pain. Thankfully the doctor spoke enough English that telling the important medical person the details I could do most of that in English.
My blood pressure was pretty high because of the pain and the nerves but the decided since my blood pressure is usually decent (not great, but fair) and I could prove it because I’ve been taking pics of my BP every morning for my doctor, that they would just watch it a bit. They gave me a bag of IV pain meds and let me rest. It hadn’t really helped by the time the bag was empty, so they promised to get me another.
That took over an hour. I was crying by the time I finally got the meds. Basically, the end result is that the infection was very severe, but it appeared to be viral, however, because of the severity of the infection, they wanted to treat with antibiotics too. They told me which meds to go buy, (you don’t need a script to buy most meds here) and off I went. My poor flatmate had been sitting in the waiting room the whole time watching all the ER drama for the full 7 hours!
So of course, after being in the ER last night today was a day of working from home and resting. The medicine helped a lot, pain meds with codeine are a beautiful relaxing thing! LOL
I kept myself distracted by sexting and chatting with “A.” Today I sent him links to ‘How to fist” and “Spanking basics.” In the evening he called me on WhatsApp video, and we had a very sexy video chat. I loved watching his body and hearing his voice while we were talking and doing naughty things.
I keep feeling a little bit like this is all we are going to have. Something in my gut sense says that this is all he has to give, or maybe part of me even thinks since I am giving him all this attention digitally, and perhaps this is all it will be. I don’t know. But I am still really enjoying it, and I am willing to wait and see what is what.
Today I was feeling a little worse again, so you guessed it, I made myself stay in bed most of the day. That’s really hard for me to do. But since I am still really not well, my body forced me to take about 4 long naps. I guess it takes a lot of work for a body to heal and everyone knows sleep and rest is good for you when this sick.
I am happy to say I feel a beautiful connection with “A” still. He told me he felt safe with me and how he could tell me anything and he would be safe. YES, I’ve never had anyone say that out loud to me before, it is such an honor to be that for him, to hold that space. I sent him a video of fisting for him to see it in action and we both had a “happy moment” about that.
He came over in the evening on the way to go see friends. I knew he couldn’t stay so I told him I wasn’t up for drive-by sex, (he had some lovely ideas about licking me before he went out!) But I was feeling too vulnerable and sick for all that. When I told him that, he said he would come by anyway.
He only stayed for like 10 minutes, but it was so lovely to kiss him and talk to him in person and feel his body with mine. We kissed and good lord I wanted to take him to my room anyway, but I knew it was a bad idea! I leaned into him and kissed him so hard.
He had a weird message for me that felt kind of like a universe message. He said something about listening to my body, trying to be sure I heard it. I was like OK thanks I will rest of course, but then the strangest thing. He sat next to me, took my hand, and said, “No, I’m serious. Maybe your body really needs a chance, and you need to really take a look at your drinking and how much booze is in your life.”
That was pretty random because we’ve only met the one sexy time and we’ve never partied together. I felt uncomfortable but said OK, I will. But honestly the next day, I thanked him for speaking what was in his heart, and it felt like something I should and will ponder. Ha! You never know, do you?
Another day where instead of feeling better, I was feeling still sick and mostly just plain tired! This business of healing is ruining any semblance of a social life I could have. I couldn’t even write that much because of the pain meds. But I did manage to finish Part 2 of my Sunday Afternoon with “A.”
I sent the link to “A” to read. He didn’t comment quite as enthusiastically about it as the first time, but he did say he read it twice and was reliving our moments together. I can’t be the girl who reads into every potential nuance in a text. That would make me crazy.
I wanted to recover enough to go out tonight because my flatmate is having a going away dinner tonight at a relaxed dinner place. There is a horse show, and the view is impressive. It was super cool. I am glad I made myself go.
OK, I know, I know this is a big shocker, I slept all day. HA! I am feeling like this whole thing is not going in the right direction. I should be a lot more recovered than I actually am. The pain meds wear off at least two hours before the next dose is due, and the earache hurts all the time. Even with the pain meds, there is only mostly relief, never complete relief. I will definitely be texting the doctor tomorrow to see what she thinks. Tomorrow is also my last dose of antibiotics. So after 6 days I should really not be still feeling like a train hit me.
- Too many sexy texts to count
- Lots of really good feels with “A.”
- Totally sick as a dog
- 7 hours in the ER
- 6 days of being sick
- Too many naps
This was a weird week. I am not used to being sick like this, and I am definitely not used to being in so much pain for so long. I did not like it at all!
As for the boys, things with “A” were the fun new focus, but I have also to note that I spent time all week chatting with Alex. He remains one of my favorite guys, I just wish I could actually see him more. He graduated from his university program on Friday, and we’re planning for a date next week to celebrate. Maybe we’ll get some sexy times in too! 🙂